I cannot tell you how happy I am that it is Friday. Seriously, this week has kicked my butt and then some! My family is still in our house after a few unexpected delay’s in their closing of their home in AZ, thus delaying the closing of the house here in town. We love having them with us, the house is loud, it’s messy, and I’m not sure when the last time I really (and I mean REALLY) cleaned the bathrooms and the kitchen, but it doesn’t matter, we’re making memories. However, I am exhausted. Seriously Exhausted.
I’m super excited because next week is only a 2 day work week for me, the rest is vacation! Then the week of New Years Eve it’s only a 3 day work week and then vacation time! I. Can’t. Wait.
So, as promised, I snuck in a few more pics of little man, Christian. He is such a busy body, all boy, crazy, wild child that he is hard to snap pictures of.
The crack one is my favorite. Is there anything more cute than a kiddo crack? Seriously, my fav!
It’s getting cold in Spokane, but we surprisingly don’t have any snow yet. Maybe, JUST maybe for Christmas we’ll get a dusting of it, but so far winter has been pretty mild. I don’t mind, I hate driving in snow. I’m not bad at it, I just hate it. Actually, I dislike driving in general, so adding any type of elements to driving conditions isn’t my favorite.
Ok, it’s not of little bubs, but this…. Heart Melted. Princess Elsa and Uncle C-Rad snuggle buggin’ on the sofa. Can’t forget little Olaf! He’s in there too.
**Ultrasound pictures and update below**
The Pops came over for dinner sometime this last week (don’t even try to ask me which day, I can’t remember) and we got a little head start on getting ready for our Christmas Eve services at church. The Pops and I are doing a little special song/duet thing. Nothing makes me more happy then singing with my dad plays along.
This also gave me and the Hubs the perfect opportunity to share an early Christmas gift 🙂
The joy was short-lived because a few days later I started experiencing some bleeding and heavy cramping. Because loss is the only thing I know, naturally I freaked a little and called my nurse first thing in the morning. I know spotting and cramping can be completely normal. However for me, all 2 of the 3 losses we’ve had started with spotting and cramping.
My RE got me basically as soon as I could get there and we did an ultrasound. I am still measuring ahead and the first words that came out of Dr. F’s mouth was: We actually have a heart beat! I’ve never once experienced the SOUND of a heart beat. I have seen one, with Colton, but I have never heard it. We actually got to HEAR the heart. I don’t think I will EVER forget what that sounds like. Ever.
I got two souvenirs from my emergency visit:
As we get closer and closer to the time frame that we know when Colton’s heart stopped, I have loads of anxiety and, battle frequently, thoughts of despair and hopelessness. I spend a lot of energy during my day choosing to be hopeful and constantly praying for peace and less fear. So the reassurance, and flexibility of my RE to calm my crazy brain is by far the greatest gift.
I’ve realized I’ve been pretty vague about where I am actually at. I am actually 6 weeks 6 days TODAY from my LMP, however at my u/s I was 6w4d and measured at 7 weeks. However, further measuring he said I was still only measuring a day a head.
It’s still so early. Sometimes I have little moments of fear for sharing, but I promised myself I wouldn’t ever censor myself or keep secrets on the blog. This blog is about real life, my relationship with Jesus, and being honest about the good, the bad and the ugly.
So, there ya have it!
HAPPY FREAKIN’ FRIDAY!!!